what it's like to date me

Just wanted to give you a little glimpse into the life of 'I have the pleasure of dating Brooke.' The other day I sent Brad an email asking him to make me this white chicken chili. The email went something along the lines of this:

Dear Brad, 

Please make this or I will cut you in your sleep. 

Love you. 

You know, just your standard love email letter.

Brad proceeds to go to the store the next day to buy ingredients for what I thought was this mouth watering chicken chili and I am out of my mind excited for it. We're talking salsa verde, white beans, chicken goodness here.

I might have even talked this chili up to multiple people throughout the day. I just couldn't contain my excitement. Side Note: I get easily and really emotionally tied to the prospect of good food. Sorry, not sorry. 

Fast forward to that afternoon when I ask him how the chili is going... and he informs me that he decided to make a turkey chili instead of THE WHITE CHICKEN CHILI! Hold the phone. 

Are you kidding me?! 

I might have been just a smidgen disappointed...To the point I told him he might want to sleep with one eye open and then blasted him on multiple forms of social media, including but not limited to, Twitter and Snap Chat. He said I was slandering his good name and gave me multiple excuses as to why he went with the other chili...but ultimately, I was sad and I think this situation deserved shaming.

And before you tell me to stop being irrational, they are both chili, what's the big deal? ... The big deal is they are completely different forms of chili and I had my heart set on the white chicken chili and the highlight of my day was gone forever. First World Problems.

Never mind the fact that the turkey chili he made was delicious, that is besides the point.

The point is... I still want the damn white chicken chili. He better make it for me next week.....OR ELSE. 

<3 BB 

shut it down. deal breaker.

Since I know you are all wondering, the concert last night was everything my little emo heart hoped for and dreamed of. The Postal Service has always been on my must see concert list, but was hard to cross off when the band hadn't been putting new music out or traveling in years.  PLUS! I didn't even snooze my alarm this morning...That might of also had to do with the fact that Brad called me out on snoozing my alarm and said I wouldn't be able to not snooze but..... TAKE THAT, BRAD. I WON!!!!!

Anyway, The highlight of the show though, may have been his opening act Big Freedia.  Wow, that was an experience the white people of Portland might not have been ready for. TWERK, TWERK city. She he had 3 stage dancers with her and they got their twerk on. Not even sure we saw their faces once, just their backsides twerking. Twerking on the floor, twerking on the drum set, twerking on each other.... Miley would have been proud. It was awesome and weird all at the same time.

The experience got me to thinking, thank the lawd that this is not a first date for me and Brad. Could have been real awkward. And while I have my dating history, I don't really have anything good for a blog post to link up with Erin and MacKensie for when it comes to Dating Disasters....but it did make me think about how I appreciate Brad for not having crappy taste in music....That would totally be a deal breaker... This then lead me down the path of other deal breakers I have on my list.

1) He can't make a decision.

Everyone knows I am the most indecisive person ever. If you can't take the reins and make a decision for me once in a while, like where to eat or what we want to do for evening... Deal Breaker.

2) He can't handle my sarcasm and passive aggressive comments.

I am the QUEEN of passive aggressive comments with a hint of sarcasm sprinkled in. If you get offended that's a deal breaker. Also, if I use the term honey with you, it's probably because I am actually talking down to you.

3) He can't quote the following shows or relate them back to real life at a moment's notice.

Friends, The League, The Office. I am still working on Friends with Brad, may be a deal breaker in the making.

4) He has weird feet. 

Just.Eww.

5) He tells me cilantro doesn't even a have a taste.

Are You Kidding Me?! It tastes like the devil's sweat.

6.) He doesn't know how to cook. 

I can cook a delicious feast if I want to,  but sometimes I am tired and lazy and I want you to do it and it better not be mac n' cheese, unless it's the shapes kind.

7. He wears toe shoes. 

8) He makes fun of my blog. 
You make fun of my blog, I make fun of you on it.

9.) He is a bad tipper.
Come on bro, I worked in the restaurant industry. Do better than 13%.

10.) He is obessed with Twitter.
Oh wait, Brad is.... UGH.

Luckily Brad has a lot of other good qualities besides the whole can't reference Friends and is on the twitter twatter too much. I guess I'll keep him around for a little longer.

What are some of your deal breakers that would lead to disaster?!


Cheers to dating!

<3 BB