Gross Confessions

So as always on this fine Wednesday (no, it really is fine here in Portland, we have had 80+ degree weather all week), I wanted to link up with Kathy and her blog Vodka and Soda and share some confessions with you. Some of them are kind of gross. Sorry.... 

//Confession: last night on Twitter via Thought Catalog I found the most disturbing YouTube video of someone getting a 25 year old black head popped / cleaned out. It was disgusting and yet I watched all 5 mins of the video. What is wrong with me?! Only click on this link if you are sick and twisted and evidently enjoy almost throwing up. It was like a sick and disgusting train wreck that I could not stop watching. 

Ew.

Then to make things worse after it was over I started watching similar ones that were recommended to me. Who does that?! 

//That confession leads me to my next confession and the fact that I love popping zits. Mine, yours, the dogs (ok that is a lie - dogs don't even get zits) Probably weird, but they are so satisfying. Although, I am trying to be better and not touch mine anymore. Something about that wives tale where they say 17 more show up on your face the next day if you pop one. 

//And since we're keeping it gross today I will confess that I am already tired of shaving my legs for nice weather. With the weather actually being in the 80s this week, that has me wearing skirts and dresses to work - which also means I should probably shave my legs more than every 2 weeks and to be honest - It's just really, really inconvenient for me. Who shaves their legs more than twice a week? ....You mean there are people that actually shave their legs every day even?! Really?! Who has time for that?! 

Anyway, I am sorry these confessions are disgusting. I guess I am just a disgusting person. Hope you didn't lose your appetite or your meal after reading this. 

Cheers!

<3 BB


ps. gifs found here, here, and here

happy birthday, bradley

Happy Birthday to the guy::

//that makes me laugh. 

//is a kid at heart.

//introduced me to Ron Pope.

//wears a onesie with no shame. 

//might love soccer more than he loves me.

//made a second blog for us. 

//runs Tough Mudders with me.

//puts up with my crazy. 

//drives me crazy. 

//goes out of his way to embarrass me in public. 

//& makes me smile.

I kind of like you. 

Cheers to 28, Bradley!  

<3 BB

Ugh, enough with the feelings they are making me uncomfortable. 

house hunters gone wrong

Ok... it's more like Condo / Apartment Hunters, but still. This shit is hard. I find myself saying things that I yell at my tv for when I watch HGTV. Here is the thing though, when it comes to sticking to a budget. I get it now.  Doing the math on the difference of 200/mo, it's a lot when you add it up! Tired of being broke. Anyway, this past week and a half Brad and I have been checking out a few places, because our lease is up in October and we would like to be in a two bedroom. Need more closet space for our Nikes. We viewed a condo that I am a big fan of and we have one other place to check out tomorrow night. Hopefully we will have this all figured out soon, because it stresses me out. The idea of looking for a new place seems really cool at first, until I remember I can hardly decide what I want to make for dinner, let alone make a big decision like where we should live. I dread the day I actually buy a home. 

I also have a story to tell you about our apartment hunting. It's probably not blog appropriate, but I am going to tell it anyway, because it's so funny. (heads up: if you don't find poop funny, you might want to quit reading).... 

On Sunday, Brad and I were on our 3rd apartment complex tour of the day and we were both tired of the apartment hunting. The complex itself looked pretty nice, but it was really annoying because they did not have any apartments to actually show us. Red flag number 1. 

The lady basically tells us that their policy is they do not show apartments until they are move in ready, which essentially means you would see them the day you move in. Uh no thanks. Red flag number 2. 

After our pointless meeting we decide to walk around the complex a little bit. We head over to the pool area that is fillllllled with children running around unsupervised being idiots wild. Red flag number 3.

This is where the story starts to get good. We stop at the restrooms before we head out.... After Brad comes out of the restroom he is so distraught. Dry heaving and gagging, just so upset. I ask him what's wrong. His answer: I just stepped in poop...... HUMAN POOP!  

Wait, what??!!?!?!?!?!?!

Oh Jesus. Not Ok. Dis.Gus.Ting.

I start dying. Can't control my laughter. He is trying to find grass to wipe his shoe off or a lighter to burn the shoe. I am still dying from laughter. 

Needless to say our experience there was ruined and even if we had fallen in love with an apartment there, we would not be getting it because Brad is scarred for life.  

Naturally Monday I spent all day sending him photos like this, and this, and this.  I am a great girlfriend.

*Also, for the record, I do not feel bad sharing this story since he updated his facebook status to tell people he stepped in people poop, so sharing it on the blog is fair game.*

Cheers to poop?!

<3 BB 

Images: 1, 2, 3,